lalalalalala old convos

freddiemercurynewport: HEYsqwerty13: hisqwerty13: whats going onsqwerty13: i missed you... you havnt talked to me in like FOREVERsqwerty13: what 2 hrsfreddiemercurynewport: noooofreddiemercurynewport: an hour or lesssqwerty13: okfreddiemercurynewport: What are you doing?sqwerty13: usqwerty13: freddiemercurynewport: lolfreddiemercurynewport: I wish I could write positive love songsBUZZ!!!BUZZ!!!sqwerty13: so whats upfreddiemercurynewport: ntohingfreddiemercurynewport: boredfreddiemercurynewport: lonelyfreddiemercurynewport: sadsqwerty13: me toofreddiemercurynewport: then hang out with mesqwerty13: why so sadsqwerty13: no gas in my carfreddiemercurynewport: okay I'llc ome see you thenfreddiemercurynewport: what do you think? shy girlsqwerty13: nopesqwerty13: im in my pjfreddiemercurynewport: So?sqwerty13: lolfreddiemercurynewport: you let Shawn see you in themfreddiemercurynewport: and he's a peodfreddiemercurynewport: *pedosqwerty13: lolfreddiemercurynewport: You're just SHY and SCAREDsqwerty13: nosqwerty13: im tired and lazyfreddiemercurynewport: HEY! Turn up your radiooooooo....... Ooooooh there's something I want you to know!sqwerty13: oksqwerty13: always singingfreddiemercurynewport: yeahfreddiemercurynewport: HOLY SHITsqwerty13: huhfreddiemercurynewport: I just accidently blasted my radio haha.... I accidently removed the headphones offfreddiemercurynewport: and it was on full blastsqwerty13: lolfreddiemercurynewport: it was badsqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: i might let you come oversqwerty13: i might notfreddiemercurynewport: Whensqwerty13: tonightsqwerty13: maybe notfreddiemercurynewport: whysqwerty13: lolfreddiemercurynewport: I really want to come oversqwerty13: i betfreddiemercurynewport: Yeah you gotta let me knowwwwwwwwwwwwohohohohfreddiemercurynewport: I turned down a girl tonight just so I could talk to youfreddiemercurynewport: and you won't hang out with meeeeeeeee?sqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: okay where tofreddiemercurynewport: and that girl was IN PERSONsqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: i rocksqwerty13: i got you hookedfreddiemercurynewport: I could of had sexsqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: could have but wontfreddiemercurynewport: Maybe I should of ditched talking to you so I could of gone with her for the niiiiightsqwerty13: but you didntfreddiemercurynewport: OUT OF TOUCH! Outtttta reach yeahfreddiemercurynewport: no but I probably could stillBUZZ!!!sqwerty13: maybeyfreddiemercurynewport: Out of touchfreddiemercurynewport: do you want me to come? yes or no, cause if not, I'm gonna go and sit somewhere and be alone, as usual, cause I haven't any friends and I'm a lonely personsqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: where do you wana hang outfreddiemercurynewport: Don't knowfreddiemercurynewport: anywheresqwerty13: brbfreddiemercurynewport: oksqwerty13: alright you have my full attentionfreddiemercurynewport: howsqwerty13: its all youfreddiemercurynewport: ??sqwerty13: i was on the phonesqwerty13: talking to one of my friendsfreddiemercurynewport: oksqwerty13: boy problems!sqwerty13: i told her to eat a candy bar and call me in the morningsqwerty13: freddiemercurynewport: ohsqwerty13: so if you could ask me anything in the worls what would you ask mesqwerty13: world*freddiemercurynewport: nothingsqwerty13: so you know everything about me?freddiemercurynewport: oksqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: ok as in you know every thing about me?freddiemercurynewport: I don't knowsqwerty13: okaysqwerty13: so what do you wana knowfreddiemercurynewport: nothingsqwerty13: FINE!freddiemercurynewport: yeahsqwerty13: im boredsqwerty13: entertain mesqwerty13: so....freddiemercurynewport: Nosqwerty13: there was this guy who had forks for handsfreddiemercurynewport: I'm too bored toosqwerty13: and he had no earsfreddiemercurynewport: I hate the internet, it's for losers who have no livessqwerty13: and he had a pet cow who walked with him all the timesqwerty13: his name was mooiesqwerty13: and mooie liked to drink milksqwerty13: and eat woodsqwerty13: and this man who had forlks for hands liked to eat hamburger... and sometimes shared with mooiesqwerty13: and they both drank milkfreddiemercurynewport: ohsqwerty13: little did mooie know that it wasnt an utter that the forlk man hadsqwerty13: so...sqwerty13: they were walking one day and passed a girl named samsqwerty13: she was a normal little girlsqwerty13: with curly blond hair and she was quite smallsqwerty13: expecially for her age... (104)sqwerty13: then they passed a boy named jacksqwerty13: he was asking about his sister jill.... so mr. forlk pointed to the hill with the well on itsqwerty13: then sat at the bottom of the hill and laughed as the both came falling down...sqwerty13: he laughed so hard that he peed himselfsqwerty13: the endsqwerty13: *takes a bow*sqwerty13: what do you think of my form of entertainmentfreddiemercurynewport: not entertainingsqwerty13: finesqwerty13: *sad face*sqwerty13: i was gonna ask you to come over and watch a movie with me but forget it now... you hurt my feelings!!!freddiemercurynewport: oksqwerty13: okay whatsqwerty13: jake!!freddiemercurynewport: whatsqwerty13: your not fun tonightfreddiemercurynewport: cause I'm depressedsqwerty13: dont besqwerty13: be happysqwerty13: me sit at my house and watch a movie... u need a friendfreddiemercurynewport: ?sqwerty13: come not mesqwerty13: come sit at my house and watch a movie.... u need a friend*freddiemercurynewport: nahfreddiemercurynewport: I hate driving to claremontsqwerty13: so call mesqwerty13: 619-341-0553sqwerty13: it is long distance thoughfreddiemercurynewport: lol I hate talking on the phonesqwerty13: so write a songsqwerty13: or listen to musicfreddiemercurynewport: I've written hundredsfreddiemercurynewport: I listen to much 24/7freddiemercurynewport: I've never talked to you on here without listeningsqwerty13: it makes me sad that your depressedfreddiemercurynewport: I've always been depressed reallyfreddiemercurynewport: sometimes I just notice it easierfreddiemercurynewport: and medications can't control loneliness and saddnesssqwerty13: well your cute.... why are you single?sqwerty13: you could get a girl easyfreddiemercurynewport: Don't knowfreddiemercurynewport: maybe because I can't fall in lovefreddiemercurynewport: and I feel so guilty cause most girls fall in love, and I feel really bad after fucking themsqwerty13: just because you havnt doesnt mean you cantfreddiemercurynewport: I can'tfreddiemercurynewport: I knowfreddiemercurynewport: what I'm capable ofsqwerty13: why cant youfreddiemercurynewport: Don't knowfreddiemercurynewport: I know every girl in my townfreddiemercurynewport: I've not even had a crush on onesqwerty13: so... you havnt fount the right noe yetsqwerty13: shit happensfreddiemercurynewport: lmaofreddiemercurynewport: NOT EVEN A CRUSHsqwerty13: found*freddiemercurynewport: Everyone has a crushfreddiemercurynewport: I don't have a crush on anyonesqwerty13: so find onesqwerty13: get all obsessed with themfreddiemercurynewport: Maybe it's also because I will not go out of my way for anyone, because that's the way it used to be, but I'm not fucking doing that again, if anyone wants me , they can come to me, maybe I'm just unwantedsqwerty13: stalk them... find out all about themfreddiemercurynewport: I know everything about most of the people I knowsqwerty13: yeah but slaking ppl is funsqwerty13: stalking*freddiemercurynewport: sometimes I get so weak and just want to lie on the floor, and dream, and just never wake up. When you dream, you live another life, that's the way it is.... and dreams are so much happiersqwerty13: what do you dream aboutsqwerty13: ??freddiemercurynewport: everything I don't have I guesssqwerty13: like?freddiemercurynewport: EVERYTHINGfreddiemercurynewport: and I don't like discussing anything that can't happensqwerty13: any thing is possiblesqwerty13: ANYTHINGfreddiemercurynewport: plus I don't have any friendssqwerty13: well thanks for that blowfreddiemercurynewport: it seems like no one even wants anything to do with me, or thinks I all ready am all set up and happyfreddiemercurynewport: and I'm notfreddiemercurynewport: I know bettersqwerty13: im ur friendsqwerty13: seriouslysqwerty13: i wouldnt be talking to you right now if i wasntfreddiemercurynewport: I don't consider anyone online my friend, online isn't the way to go, for all you know, I could turn out far different than you'd expectfreddiemercurynewport: You are bored, you wouldsqwerty13: i would be like fuck him and his problems... but im not... i caresqwerty13: nosqwerty13: i could be talking to my other friend who was talking to me online but i told him that i would talk to him tomorrow because i was talking to yousqwerty13: i blew him off not yousqwerty13: r u therefreddiemercurynewport: yeah just thinkingsqwerty13: okay... thinking is good... just remember that im talking to YOU right nowsqwerty13: no one else..sqwerty13: because your my friend and you need to talksqwerty13: and i caresqwerty13: i truely dosqwerty13: even if you think im a weirdo... its okay, because i already know iamfreddiemercurynewport: oksqwerty13: so you think im a weirdo?freddiemercurynewport: nosqwerty13: lol okaysqwerty13: seriously... i want you to feel bettersqwerty13: if you were here i would give you a hug to make you feel betterfreddiemercurynewport: hahasqwerty13: it would work too, because i give good hugsfreddiemercurynewport: ohfreddiemercurynewport: well, I want what everyone else really wants, love, and even you want lovesqwerty13: i dosqwerty13: true love... the kind that i have never seen outside of moviessqwerty13: its rarefreddiemercurynewport: I was in love oncesqwerty13: and when i find it i hope to god that its a mutual thingsqwerty13: oh?freddiemercurynewport: yeahsqwerty13: and..freddiemercurynewport: she thought I cheated on her, and fucked around too muhfreddiemercurynewport: muchsqwerty13: so she broke up with you?freddiemercurynewport: LIFE IS TOUGH!!!...... on your own! And now I'm waiting for the skies, I'm waiting for looo-ooooooo-oooooooooooooo-ooooooooooooooooovvvvvvvvvvvvve!sqwerty13: perfect... your singing againfreddiemercurynewport: yeah she did, but not like a childish wayfreddiemercurynewport: it was basically over I guessfreddiemercurynewport: I'm singing a VERY SAD songsqwerty13: were you cheeting on herfreddiemercurynewport: Nopesqwerty13: so did you try to get her back?freddiemercurynewport: I'd not do thatfreddiemercurynewport: cuase things just never workfreddiemercurynewport: and I don't like to look back at painfreddiemercurynewport: or remembersqwerty13: well let me tell you this... she wasnt your true love thenfreddiemercurynewport: last thing she said to me, 'QUIT BOTHERING MY COUSIN OR I WILL CALL THE POLICE'freddiemercurynewport: and her cousin is a year older than me, and a guysqwerty13: everything happens for a reason and if that didt work out then there is a possibility that there is something way better out there for yousqwerty13: above and beyond what you hadfreddiemercurynewport: Haven't loved anyone else, and haven't had a crush sincefreddiemercurynewport: and that was like 3 years ago or morefreddiemercurynewport: I trrrrrry and mend the broken pieces, I try to fight the tears, they say it's just a state of mind, but it happens to everyone! How it hurts, deep inside, when your love has cut you down inside, this life is tough! on your own, and now I'm waiting for something to fall from the skies, I'm waiting for lovesqwerty13: just dont give upfreddiemercurynewport: I have. NO MORE SEARCHING FOR LOVE dearyfreddiemercurynewport: I don't want to FIND anyonefreddiemercurynewport: I want them to FIND mefreddiemercurynewport: that's why in everyway, they must FIND mesqwerty13: well if they find you.... how will you know if your not looking your selffreddiemercurynewport: the way I feel, is like, have you even been so lonely that you felt sick, and weak, and wanted to cry yet couldn't?? You just feel like dying and feeling like it'd be better if you were dead?sqwerty13: yesfreddiemercurynewport: Well, I've felt that all my life, and haven't stoppedfreddiemercurynewport: and everyone knows I'm singlesqwerty13: well then stop waiting and do something about itfreddiemercurynewport: the only people I could get is milfs, or younger people like 18 or so with children, so I guess it's all milfs yeah?sqwerty13: milfs?freddiemercurynewport: I USED TO FUCKING SEARCH FOR LOVE, BUT IT IS FUCKING USLESS WHEN I FUCKING KNOW EVERYONE AND EVERYONE FUCKING KNOWS ME! Everyone knows mefreddiemercurynewport: mother I'd like to fuck!freddiemercurynewport: but not mefreddiemercurynewport: I don't want to fuck any mothersqwerty13: ewwwwwwfreddiemercurynewport: yeahsqwerty13: well i dont know you and you dont know me... so you cant say you know everyonefreddiemercurynewport: I know enoughsqwerty13: okay andfreddiemercurynewport: Loneliness is my hiding place, and music will be my mistress......... loving like a whore!freddiemercurynewport: I just feel so bad right nowfreddiemercurynewport: it's un-believablefreddiemercurynewport: I just feel badfreddiemercurynewport: really badfreddiemercurynewport: it's like nothing matterssqwerty13: im sorrysqwerty13: i dont know what else to say other then to hang in there.... and stop waiting get out there...freddiemercurynewport: I hate the fucking Queen song 'Friends Will Be Friends' cause I don't know any friends who visit me when I'm sad and lonely, and I don't have any anywaysqwerty13: trying to get me to visit you? freddiemercurynewport: When I die you know, I'm going to go back to anyone that's ever tried to hurt me, and I will haunt them so bad that suicide is their only escapefreddiemercurynewport: I'm not kiddingfreddiemercurynewport: I've got the power and will to go backsqwerty13: good thing i know this now... i wont piss you offsqwerty13: freddiemercurynewport: anyway, I'm going to sit on my fucking lawn alone and be alone, think alone, love no one, no one love me, basically NOTHING, just sit there, chain smoke my cigarettes, and think to myselffreddiemercurynewport: people ask me why I smoke all the time, I mean, really, I CAN smoke 5 packs a day, literallysqwerty13: let me come over and i will smoke with youfreddiemercurynewport: and they say "you're gonna die" but I say "does it fucking matter if I do or not?"freddiemercurynewport: no comment from them!sqwerty13: i caresqwerty13: dont die!!sqwerty13: and smoking wont kill you... your destiny willsqwerty13: however your supposed to die is how you will diefreddiemercurynewport: Tomorrow I'm going to start recording TONS AND TONS of vocal tracks, incase I ever do die, whoever can hire musicians to write the music to them, and release the songs.. hidden messages will be ALL over the place...sqwerty13: there is a lady at the place i work who is 101 and she smokes and has been since she was 20sqwerty13: and she is in perfect healthfreddiemercurynewport: sofreddiemercurynewport: I don't even go to the doctors anymorefreddiemercurynewport: If I die, from anything, I diefreddiemercurynewport: when I'm sick, I don't even take medicationsfreddiemercurynewport: that's how shitty my life isfreddiemercurynewport: nothing matterssqwerty13: sqwerty13: cheer up.... freddiemercurynewport: Here's a bit from a song I wrotesqwerty13: kfreddiemercurynewport: The sun will start to rise But my fight has just begun Drowing in the shadows, it isn't so easy I can't move, I can't blink, I can't whisper freely My screams are truly ignored But you never look back, you go foreward Don't ignore me like this, through and through In the end, I'll be the one to choose your time of death Look in my eyes, and take your last breathsqwerty13: wow... thats really goodsqwerty13: u should be proud of your writingfreddiemercurynewport: I amfreddiemercurynewport: and that's the only reason I livesqwerty13: goodsqwerty13: not goodfreddiemercurynewport: I have nothing else to live forfreddiemercurynewport: oh wellsqwerty13: live for familyfreddiemercurynewport: I'm going outside to sit on my fucking lawn and be alone againfreddiemercurynewport: No, I'd rather die before themsqwerty13: dream of children, futurefreddiemercurynewport: I'll be on my front lawnfreddiemercurynewport: byesqwerty13: careersqwerty13: want me to look for youfreddiemercurynewport: nosqwerty13: come back and talk to me?sqwerty13: when your done...freddiemercurynewport: I'm gonna go for a few hours, and drive somewhere and sit and get more andd more depressedsqwerty13: please dontfreddiemercurynewport: I do it all the timesqwerty13: so that was beforefreddiemercurynewport: I fucking hate talking onlinesqwerty13: so dont... come overfreddiemercurynewport: nofreddiemercurynewport: I HATE going to claremontsqwerty13: so call mefreddiemercurynewport: i hate the phonefreddiemercurynewport: it's stupidfreddiemercurynewport: I hate it all reallysqwerty13: just dont get more depressedfreddiemercurynewport: I can't stop being depressedsqwerty13: do what you have to do... but get happy... i like you happyfreddiemercurynewport: I'm very depressed now, so bad that I have anxiety nowfreddiemercurynewport: I'm NEVER happyfreddiemercurynewport: never was happyfreddiemercurynewport: always sadsqwerty13: oksqwerty13: just know that i do care about you... you make me laugh even if your not laughingfreddiemercurynewport: Remember how the lyrics go? Ohhhhh yes I'm the great pretender, pretending I'm doing well, my need is such, I pretend too much! I'm lonely but no one can tellsqwerty13: yeah, but still... your none of the above.... your hurt... broken... but still fixablefreddiemercurynewport: no, I don't thinnk sofreddiemercurynewport: NOTHING CAN MAKE ME HAPPY BUT LOVEfreddiemercurynewport: And without love, everyone is lonelysqwerty13: you just have to want to be fixed and tryfreddiemercurynewport: you, me, God, societysqwerty13: u have to trysqwerty13: when was the last time you triedfreddiemercurynewport: Almost everyday of my life dearyfreddiemercurynewport: I'm too evil looking, I get mis-took for a serial killersqwerty13: your not trying now... your giving upfreddiemercurynewport: that's cause I fucking know everyonefreddiemercurynewport: I'm not attracted to anyonefreddiemercurynewport: no one attracted to mefreddiemercurynewport: and the ones that are, are just desperatefreddiemercurynewport: and would end up leaving mesqwerty13: you cant say that because you dont knowfreddiemercurynewport: I've been through it all, I've watched relationships fallfreddiemercurynewport: Dear, I've tried dating people many timesfreddiemercurynewport: and it never works outfreddiemercurynewport: MANY FUCKING TIMESsqwerty13: okayfreddiemercurynewport: So tired of life, seeing everyone with somebody to lovesqwerty13: just go find a quite spot and think... vent... scream... write.... what ever will make you feel better... and then come and talk to mefreddiemercurynewport: nothing makes me feel betterfreddiemercurynewport: nothingsqwerty13: you know what your right... fuck love... it doesnt existsqwerty13: its a figment of everyones imaginationsqwerty13: no one will find it if they found it once alreadyfreddiemercurynewport: I'm very truthful and the lies arn't the answer, even if it makes people feel bettersqwerty13: everyone should give up... fuck lovefreddiemercurynewport: you do not get itfreddiemercurynewport: I'm very smartfreddiemercurynewport: genious levels dear, and I remember EVERYTHINGfreddiemercurynewport: every word anyone saysfreddiemercurynewport: lyrics to ANY song, even if I've heard it oncefreddiemercurynewport: and hate the songsqwerty13: and your point would be...freddiemercurynewport: I know EVERYONE in this townfreddiemercurynewport: I've met them allfreddiemercurynewport: and many out of town toosqwerty13: and...freddiemercurynewport: including claremont, charlestown, and towns of other townsfreddiemercurynewport: NO ONE TO LOVEfreddiemercurynewport: NO ONE TO LOVE MEsqwerty13: so who said your love even existssqwerty13: who said they live in your townfreddiemercurynewport: I know so MANY peoplefreddiemercurynewport: I meet SO many peoplefreddiemercurynewport: I meet people ALL the timesqwerty13: how do you know that when you turn 21 your love wont move to your townfreddiemercurynewport: you wouldn't believe itfreddiemercurynewport: cause I won't even be heresqwerty13: ppl move here all the timesqwerty13: how do you know you wouldnt meet someone when they were on vacationfreddiemercurynewport: Hahahfreddiemercurynewport: I travel all over New England all the timesqwerty13: r u really laughing or just typing itfreddiemercurynewport: and meet THOUSANDS of people, literallyfreddiemercurynewport: laughing in a way telling you are wrongfreddiemercurynewport: and I don't want pitysqwerty13: you depress me... and im a happy person... sqwerty13: it agravates me that your not okayfreddiemercurynewport: I know I dofreddiemercurynewport: I don't have any friends in person dearfreddiemercurynewport: Shawn took them allsqwerty13: i feel sad for you, and your out look on lifefreddiemercurynewport: and besides, I'm very weirdsqwerty13: i like weirdfreddiemercurynewport: I don't carefreddiemercurynewport: I do, but don'tsqwerty13: i didnt think you didfreddiemercurynewport: you don't understandsqwerty13: i never willfreddiemercurynewport: I KNOW some people like itfreddiemercurynewport: but I'm talking love here, not friendships and I can't find anyone to lovesqwerty13: compaired to you im incompitantfreddiemercurynewport: A person will millions of friends and fans can be lonely if they live without lovesqwerty13: surefreddiemercurynewport: I HAVE NEVER FUCKED ANYONE I LOVE or even would think of lovingfreddiemercurynewport: Complete loneliness aftersqwerty13: so your already living the rockstar life.... sqwerty13: wam bam thank you maamfreddiemercurynewport: I don't carefreddiemercurynewport: I'm just so sadfreddiemercurynewport: you should see the look on my facesqwerty13: i knowsqwerty13: u should see the look on minefreddiemercurynewport: better than minesqwerty13: i betfreddiemercurynewport: Imagine living without someone to talk to? Living without any friends? No people to talka bout your problems with, no one to make you feel better, and then on top of that, no one to love? That's how I fucking live EVERYDAYsqwerty13: i feel like crying for yousqwerty13: i offer friend ship... and get shot down... obviously you dont want friends right nowfreddiemercurynewport: well you lied to me dear, and that made me WORSEfreddiemercurynewport: *made me FEEL worse!sqwerty13: lied?freddiemercurynewport: yeahfreddiemercurynewport: You said you have no gas in your car, then said "want me to find you?"sqwerty13: my parents carfreddiemercurynewport: I hate lies, and I'm tired of being lied tofreddiemercurynewport: everyone lies to mesqwerty13: NOsqwerty13: i dont have gas in my carsqwerty13: but my parents are sleeping and i dont think that they are going to be using their cars right now!sqwerty13: ask dont assumefreddiemercurynewport: here's one of my favorite lines by Queenfreddiemercurynewport: I'm just the shadow of the man I used to beAnd it seems like there's no way out of this for meI used to bring you sunshineNow all I ever do is bring you down, ooohHow would it be if you were standing in my shoesCan't you see that it's impossible to chooseNo there's no making sense of itEvery way I go I'm bound to lose, oh yeahsqwerty13: all i wanted to do was to make you feel better and as i can see... nothing is going to do that... its a loose loose battle... so i am giving up... not on our friendship.... but on trying to make you feel better tonight... because no matter waht i say its not right!freddiemercurynewport: I don't knowfreddiemercurynewport: maybe I should fuck a girl who is on drugsfreddiemercurynewport: then I can at least feel better for a few minutessqwerty13: why would that make you feel betterfreddiemercurynewport: cause sex makes me feel better for a few minutessqwerty13: okay but why a girl on drugsfreddiemercurynewport: because I don't have to think about muchsqwerty13: thats the part that didnt make sencefreddiemercurynewport: cause everyone else falls for me to easily and I can't love them backsqwerty13: cant or wontfreddiemercurynewport: CAN'Tsqwerty13: okfreddiemercurynewport: I told you, I don't even develope crushesfreddiemercurynewport: don't you ever feel the same way?sqwerty13: all the time... but not as passionatly as you dofreddiemercurynewport: ohsqwerty13: starting today... im gonna do everything in my power to be the bestest friend to you... thats it.. just a friend.... to show you that you can love a friend.... and they can love you... as just a friendsqwerty13: seriouslyfreddiemercurynewport: I'm far different than youfreddiemercurynewport: I fuck all my female friends sqwerty13: me toofreddiemercurynewport: you fuck all your female friends?sqwerty13: freddiemercurynewport: No I'm serious even though I laughed cause I really dofreddiemercurynewport: I'm going to fuck you anywaysqwerty13: i dont think sofreddiemercurynewport: I think sosqwerty13: no wayfreddiemercurynewport: Yeahsqwerty13: you have issuesfreddiemercurynewport: How so?sqwerty13: OMG r u seriousefreddiemercurynewport: DON'T KNOW!sqwerty13: do u have split personalitiesfreddiemercurynewport: What the fuck? Why do you think that?sqwerty13: one min ago your talking like your gonna kill everone in newport and now your tellin gme your gonna fuck mefreddiemercurynewport: Nofreddiemercurynewport: I wouldn't killsqwerty13: i make decisions on my bodyfreddiemercurynewport: I'm very depressedfreddiemercurynewport: Will you fuck me someday?sqwerty13: u dont have to tell me that i knowsqwerty13: i dont knowfreddiemercurynewport: yeah but I thought you thought that I wasn't and have split personalitiesfreddiemercurynewport: It's just sex gets my mind off thingssqwerty13: yeahfreddiemercurynewport: That's what I do with people when they are depressedsqwerty13: you need a friendfreddiemercurynewport: I knowsqwerty13: sex messes up friendshipsfreddiemercurynewport: You don't understand mefreddiemercurynewport: No one does I guessfreddiemercurynewport: I want LOVE, but having sex with people, I AM NEVER ATTRACTED TO ANYONEfreddiemercurynewport: I never fall for themsqwerty13: i try to understand you, but it gets hard at timesfreddiemercurynewport: I can have a conversation with someone, and then in the middle of it, fuck them, and then I can have it with them againfreddiemercurynewport: See how weird I am?sqwerty13: so your not attracted to them... but you get horny... fuck them... and then go back to where you left offfreddiemercurynewport: Maybefreddiemercurynewport: it's HARD to understandsqwerty13: no kiddingfreddiemercurynewport: You probably think I'm insanefreddiemercurynewport: But I'm notfreddiemercurynewport: my views are just differentsqwerty13: no..ive met my share of insane pplfreddiemercurynewport: Tell me why someone can't be friends, yet have sex with eachother?sqwerty13: no... i think they can... i told you... i have a few friends like thatfreddiemercurynewport: yeahsqwerty13: but your differentfreddiemercurynewport: but the thing is, I think you feel that since I'm so sad, you couldnt' fuck me cause it'd be wrongfreddiemercurynewport: and that's where everyone is wrongfreddiemercurynewport: I'm not any differentfreddiemercurynewport: and I'm fine when I get my mind off thingsfreddiemercurynewport: working I'm NEVER depressedfreddiemercurynewport: it's when I'm HERE, at this STUPID computerfreddiemercurynewport: or when I'm doing NOTHINGfreddiemercurynewport: I need to be ENTERTAINEDsqwerty13: i dont think it would be wrong i think it would be fun.... freddiemercurynewport: and have excitimentfreddiemercurynewport: I very rarely get into these depressive moodsfreddiemercurynewport: but I'm STILL depressed, just not as badfreddiemercurynewport: cause when I'm entertained, I don't think of any painfreddiemercurynewport: same with anxiety, works the same waysqwerty13: but i think you need someone to hang out with... a friend you can cuddle with and watch a movie yet know that it means your a good friendsqwerty13: someone to listen to your problems, some one to care about youfreddiemercurynewport: well come watch a movie with me sometime!freddiemercurynewport: I used to watch movies with friends, but Shawn stole all themsqwerty13: no problem!freddiemercurynewport: No I'm feeling badfreddiemercurynewport: because what if I get sexual?sqwerty13: controlfreddiemercurynewport: Now everything's changedfreddiemercurynewport: you think differentlyfreddiemercurynewport: I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!sqwerty13: lolfreddiemercurynewport: it's like pityfreddiemercurynewport: I hate pitysqwerty13: i wont have sexwith you thoughfreddiemercurynewport: No one knows how I feelsqwerty13: becaause you dont explainesqwerty13: you leave it alonefreddiemercurynewport: Why won't you have sex with me? and how do I not explain?sqwerty13: because im gonna be your friend... and you dont explane how you feel you sit by your selfsqwerty13: tonight you talked to me... even thought i thought you wernt going tofreddiemercurynewport: I'm sorry, but you sit by yourself toosqwerty13: i do i love my alone timesqwerty13: but i would love to have company if i were sadfreddiemercurynewport: See, everyone needs friendsfreddiemercurynewport: Understand, I KNOW I NEED FRIENDS, but that's not what I'm aftersqwerty13: well you should befreddiemercurynewport: I could live without your friendship, but I'd love with itfreddiemercurynewport: But now I probably seem like I only want to fuck you because I still want tofreddiemercurynewport: I want lovefreddiemercurynewport: That's what I wantsqwerty13: most ppl dofreddiemercurynewport: Now I feel stupidsqwerty13: why?freddiemercurynewport: I don't knowsqwerty13: dont feel stupidsqwerty13: really dontfreddiemercurynewport: Sort of because, I guarantee you would of had sex with me before, but now that you know how I feel, you don't, and it feels like pitysqwerty13: nothing you said or did makes you sound stupid to mefreddiemercurynewport: and I despise pityfreddiemercurynewport: I hate itfreddiemercurynewport: I HATE it when people feel bad for mefreddiemercurynewport: that is NOT what I wantfreddiemercurynewport: I just want them to understandfreddiemercurynewport: I hate it when people change their viewsfreddiemercurynewport: and you've completely changed yourssqwerty13: so would you rather have led me on... and start to like you then have sex with you so that you could tell me that you would never love mefreddiemercurynewport: what do you mean?sqwerty13: if we never had this conversation tonight...sqwerty13: then tomorrow i came over and we had sexsqwerty13: and then i started to like youfreddiemercurynewport: you wouldn't of, and that's the reason I wanted to have sex with yousqwerty13: but you didnt feel the same way because you cantfreddiemercurynewport: You said you don't get attractedsqwerty13: it dependsfreddiemercurynewport: well just hang out with me sometimefreddiemercurynewport: I want to sqwerty13: i would like thatfreddiemercurynewport: spend the night with me!freddiemercurynewport: Are you able and allowed?sqwerty13: yeah... why wouldnt ifreddiemercurynewport: I don't know, I was just curiousfreddiemercurynewport: no one ever goes hoem the the night they visit mefreddiemercurynewport: always ends up sleeping overfreddiemercurynewport: actually end up staying up all nightfreddiemercurynewport: time goes by too fastfreddiemercurynewport: but I'm going to go masterbate now to ease my pain, then a cigarette, then go to the storefreddiemercurynewport: I'll be back on tomorrowsqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: r u okfreddiemercurynewport: yeah whysqwerty13: well u werntsqwerty13: i was really worried about youfreddiemercurynewport: I know, because I'm thinking of SEX and it gets my mind off things cause I'm getting entertainedfreddiemercurynewport: the more entertained, the more better I amsqwerty13: more better?sqwerty13: lolfreddiemercurynewport: the only time I am sad and depressed and think about the worst, is when I have time to thinkfreddiemercurynewport: And SEX, going places, and working, keeps my mind off thingssqwerty13: okat well go have funfreddiemercurynewport: All rightsqwerty13: and i will talk to you tomorrowfreddiemercurynewport: Okaysqwerty13: nightfreddiemercurynewport: I want you to hang out with me soon, very soon!sqwerty13: kfreddiemercurynewport: No one has visited me the past week freddiemercurynewport: the last person who visited me was Chris's ex girlfriendsqwerty13: oksqwerty13: well tomorrow i have class untill 9 then the rest of the week i work nights untill sunday... sunday night i dont workfreddiemercurynewport: will you come sunday night if possible?sqwerty13: yeah i can do thatfreddiemercurynewport: thankssqwerty13: you pick a moviefreddiemercurynewport: okayfreddiemercurynewport: can I sit in your lap when you come over?sqwerty13: and i'll bring a few incase i dont like your picksqwerty13: freddiemercurynewport: I only have VHS in my apartmentfreddiemercurynewport: and I've got a ton of moviessqwerty13: okay so i'll bring my dvd playerfreddiemercurynewport: Let me pick! freddiemercurynewport: I don't know if it'll hook upsqwerty13: it willfreddiemercurynewport: but you didn't answer, can I sit in your lap when you come over?sqwerty13: um... i have never been asked that beforesqwerty13: i guess sofreddiemercurynewport: I'm a weird personsqwerty13: yeahfreddiemercurynewport: well I'm going to sleepfreddiemercurynewport: well actually notfreddiemercurynewport: close enoughfreddiemercurynewport: Nightsqwerty13: lolsqwerty13: nightfreddiemercurynewport: thanks for talking to me when I was upsetsqwerty13: thats what friends are for